Your tender, soft, sweet tone of voice
The story starts like this: I was listening to somebody over a phone and was fascinated by the tenderness, softness and gentleness of the voice tone on the other end of a phone line. My fascination was amplified by the fact that the voice owner was someone whom I would call a man of power: an influential, charismatic business entrepreneur. Stereotypically, we expect a formal, assertive and serious tone coming from a hierarchical position of power. Nonetheless, this conversation drew attention to, perhaps, a conscious shift in terms of what voice tone we go for in executive communication.
When you think about it, have you come across people of power who would be fantastic in maneuvering their gentle tone of voice? Well, I have. And if you look among well-known world leaders today, you will effortlessly come across the same communication pattern being repeated and consistent, no doubt. Just listen to them, some of them are so tender and so gentle in certain communication instances.
So why does power employ tenderness and gentleness? To put it simply, it is a no threat policy. This specific tone of voice makes communication less formal, an individual more approachable, it also reduces status barriers. Moreover, it is part of a broader conversation on social intelligence skills being enacted in communication. Voice tone tenderness conveys an illusion of things under control, induces trust, stability, reliability, peace and good life. Stay with me, work with me, it is harmless, nice and it feels good.
Manipulation in communication: good, bad or both?
So power people manipulate when they talk, right? Who knows what their real intentions are? Manipulation in communication: is it acceptable?
The verb “manipulate” can convey negativity, but it does not have to do so. According to Merriam Webster’s Dictionary, for example, to “manipulate” means “to control or play upon by artful, unfair, or insidious means especially to one’s own advantage.” This definition allows, then, the use of control for one’s advantage in an artful and honest way. However, it is important to note that actions cannot be criminal in nature, if we want to look at manipulation in a no evil light.
Edward Bernays, the so-called “Father of Public Relations”, went further in his beliefs of the ethicality of manipulation stating that public manipulation was not only moral, but a necessity. He argued that “a small, invisible government who understands the mental processes and social patterns of the masses, rules public opinion by consent.” This, according to him, is necessary to prevent chaos and confusion.
Manipulation in communication successfully employs a variety of communication techniques to achieve ends that may be either good or bad, moral or immoral depending on the goal of a manipulator. Specific techniques used in speaking are simply meant to maximize the effect of messages.
What is the effect of deliberate tenderness in one’s tone of voice? It soothes, definitely, it hypnotizes, as well, it is purely Zen. People like it and feel drawn to a voice like that.
Master rhetoricians: Winston Churchill and Adolf Hitler
The gentle tone of voice is a relatively new technique assisting to establish influence, authority and credibility. If we look at two great rhetoricians Winston Churchill and Adolf Hitler, tenderness and gentleness was a no technique for them. Churchill specifically opted for correctness of diction, rhythm, accumulation of argument, extravagance in the use of expressions which aimed to embody strong feelings. He embodied an assertive, even stubborn, firm tone of voice. Hitler, on the other hand, used a lot of propagandist techniques and his pattern in speaking was about keeping a message simple, being assertive, no half statements, appealing to the masses, repeating the same message constantly in the firm voice and targeting emotions of the audience.
Times were different back then. Leaders were meant to inspire and produce followers who admired them and blindly followed. Modern times, on the other hand, have proved inspirational leaders to be insufficient in crowd influence and establishment of the authority. Information age has allowed a range of two-way communication channels and disclosed the need of connectedness. New set of leadership values have emerged and proved to be efficient: e.g., vitality, humility and empathy help leaders connect; openness, unselfishness and responsibility help set the leadership tone. In general, the goal of communication is no longer about solely informing or entertaining the crowd. Rather, it has to involve and support the audience. Having a more in-depth look, a well-known scholar Bill Quirk presented the theory of modern effective communication, the communication escalator which portrays the efficiency of communication via the degree of audience involvement. It tells us more on strategies of effective executive communication.
Tenderness and gentleness add to creating a safe environment where we can be open, trusting and honest. This is exactly what leadership needs today in order to gain attention and credibility, create a trustworthy tone in all contents created.
